2012 Resolutions Recap

As we wind down this year of 2012, it's time for me to don the proverbial big girl undergarments and revisit those resolutions made back in January.  Confession is good for the soul, they say.  So, let's see how we did here, and maybe that will help me focus in order to develop some worthwhile resolutions for 2013.

2012 Resolutions:
1)  Lose Weight.
Okay, so, I did manage to get a good start on this one, praise the Lord.  I'm not all the way where I need to be, but I'm down 18 pounds!  (In a spirit of total and full confession, I was down 18 pounds at the start of December.  I have backslid a bit during this month, I hate to admit).  But, I have clothes in my closet that no longer fit well, and it's because they're too big instead of being too small!  That's a huge blessing.  Here's a picture from Christmas 2011 taken before Jmk and I headed out for his office Christmas party:

And, here's one from this year:

Why, yes!  He HAS lost a lot of weight himself!  He's down 28 pounds so far.  I'm so, so proud of his success.  And, yes, you're right.  My bookshelves are quite stuffed full of unorganized things.  :-)  Better Homes and Gardens is not really beating my door down for my decorating style.  ::grin::

What have we been doing?  Putting down the fork.  ::shrug::  It's not fun, and it's not complicated.  If you take in less calories than you burn during a day, then you lose weight eventually.  The type of calories you take in matter, of course.  But, when you track everything that goes into your mouth, then you tend to eat the foods that give you the most bang for your caloric buck.  And brownies just don't have the bang.  ::sadness::  :-)  I've got another few lbs to go yet.  (maybe another 5 or so?)  I want to be at a place that allows me some wiggle room during the holidays as well as get me down into a solid size.  I'm sort of in between two sizes right now, and I want to get fully into a single one.  Know what I mean?



2)  Exercise More.
I definitely did exercise more than I did in 2011.  But I definitely did NOT exercise as much as I meant to.  I need to be doing something 3 days a week at a very minimum.  Not for weight loss, but for health reasons and for strength.  I had spurts during the year where I would totally be on the treadmill 4 or 5 times in a week, and then spurts where I'd slack off for 6 or more weeks at a time.  So, I guess you could say I sorta kept this resolution and sorta didn't.  :-/


3)  Get back my side splits and a 90 degree arabesque.
Hmmm.  Well, I'm *this* close to the side splits.   I have no one to blame but myself for that one.  I simply didn't stretch consistently like I should have.  I have no excuse; I just didn't do it.  Fail.  But, I am close enough for government work with regard to the arabesque.  I'd call it about an 88 degree arabesque.

I'd definitely say I need my leg up a couple more inches and get my standing leg to turn out better.  (Turnout has never been my strong point).  And, my left shoulder needs to get down.  And my entire torso needs to be picked up more.  And that left hip needs to get down into place.  And...  Aaarrrgggh!  I have to stop before I decide that I didn't get anywhere near the arabesque I wanted.  It's better than it was a year ago, and I need to remember that.  I wish I'd thought to take a picture of it then so as to have photographic evidence of the progress.


4)  Finish the Couch to 5K program.
::sigh::  Man, being honest on here stinks!  No, I never finished the whole program.  I got closer than I have in the past!  I finished through week 7, and then school started back in the fall.  And once my mornings were spent schooling, I just couldn't seem to get myself together enough to take time to exercise after lunch.  I really don't know quite how to make exercise time fit into my day, even now.  But, as I'm trying to formulate my 2013 resolutions, knowing that that is one of them, I must figure something out.  I must!  I can't wait till the wee one is older and all that.


5)  Feel like I'm able to dance a swing with my youngest brother.
Well, I actually do think that I could make it through one now.  I'm not nearly in the type of shape I ought to be in, but I do think I'm in better shape than I was at the beginning of 2012.  And, I think I could get through a swing with him without feeling ill.  Ha!  So, I'll call this one a success.


I think that having these public resolutions this year were somewhat helpful for me!  So, I'll give this another go in 2013.  In complete honesty, my greatest success (the weight loss) was possible because Jmk was/is doing it with me.  We work so well as a team, and when we do things together, we always seem to be more successful.  We definitely have more fun!  So, thank you honey for being the most wonderfulest husband ever.  :-)

I'm still thinking about 2013 resolutions, and when I get them pulled together, I'll definitely share.  Share yours with me and I'll be your cheerleader!

Thank you, Lord God, for the unmerited blessings you have bestowed on me during this past year.  Thank you for the support and kind words and needed encouragement that you sent through others that reminded me of my goals.  Thank you for the good health that you gave to us this year.  Thank you, Father, for Your mercy and Your grace.

The Thyroid Thing

So, back in November, I briefly mentioned "the thryoid thing" and talked about how I was grateful for a good checkup.  So, I'll elaborate on what that was all about, as much as I need to elaborate on medical stuff that isn't that big of a deal.  :-)

Way back in the summer, I decided to do a cleanse to help jump start an honest-to-goodness diet that I intended to go on.  Think of a parent who gives their child a big push on a bike to get them going, and then the child continues pedaling after that - that's what I wanted the cleanse to do for me.  Well, along with that, I thought that it would be a great idea to get some blood work done first.  Check my cholesterol, my glucose, and etc.  Also, I thought it would be good to compare those results with new tests after the 3-week cleanse had been completed.

So, my chiropractor ordered some tests, and when the results came in, she called me and said "Um, Leah, your cholesterol is great, everything looks fine, but your TSH..." (a marker that indicates thyroid malfunction) "...is way too high".  (Where a normal level is 0.3 to 3.7, my level was 28).   "You need to schedule an appointment with your GP".

I did so, he immediately said "start synthroid, we're not checking anything else, and here are some samples and it doesn't really matter how you take them".  ::insert questioning face here::  Well, I had Dr. Googled all weekend prior to that appointment, and even though I had to start with "what is a thyroid and where is it in your body", by the time I saw this first doctor, I had at least learned that you HAVE to take thyroid medication at a specific time and in a specific manner.  So, I left his office, called my mother-in-law who used to work for a GP herself and said "um....  this isn't right is it?"  To which she said, no it isn't at ALL.  She gave me the name of a different GP to see, and I made an appointment.

However, before I made it to that appointment, I did some MORE Dr. Googling.  (Google must be the bane of some physicians' lives.  It can really help educate patients, but it can also cause some stubbornness!)  I got to reading about how sometimes the thyroid simply gets overworked, along with the adrenals, and that there are times that supplementation, proper diet, and lifestyle changes can help to stimulate function naturally.  Well, sign me up for that!!!  I much prefer that route of medical intervention as opposed to a lifetime of pill-popping.  Thus, I postponed my GP appointment, to the chagrin of a number of people.  ;-)

But, I needed to try that route first.  It was important to me. I HAD to know if the problem could be fixed naturally.  I had to!  So, I worked with the chiro to get proper supplementation, finish the cleanse, and do the things that would help if this was a problem that could be fixed in this manner.  She had had prior success with other people who had thyroid issues, and I figured that this was my best chance, if it could work.

Unfortunately, that wasn't going to be the case for me.  My numbers continued to degrade despite big efforts.  And so, I made a new appointment with this wonderful GP, and he looked at my test results and said "how are you not lying in bed unable to function?"  I actually kept getting that question from nurses, too.  You know, that's one of the things that bugs me about my situation.  I never really felt like anything was terribly wrong.  So, how am I supposed to know if things get off again if I'm not too symptomatic in the first place?  Regardless, he started me on Synthroid (incidentally, it was the same dosage as the other doc.  But, this time, I had proper instructions, and the new doc didn't tell me to break samples in half to get the proper dosage.  That, btw, isn't a good idea with this medicine), but he also asked me to get an ultrasound of the gland to make sure that there wasn't anything "weird" going on in there that needed to be addressed.

So, I have the ultrasound and they discover nodules in the thyroid which is a fairly typical thing.  However, the GP says that when there is at least one nodule of a certain size, he refers to an endocrinologist.  I had one big enough to warrant that, so off I go to the endo.  I get to his office, and he does another ultrasound with a biopsy to make sure that there isn't anything amiss.  By God's mercy, there isn't anything wrong, and I leave with a definitive diagnosis.  Hashimoto's Thyroiditis with Hypothyroid.

Like I told my Dad, if you're going to have a chronic problem, this is the one to have!  It's sort of like rheumatoid arthritis, except that instead of your body attacking your joints, it attacks your thyroid.  The medical establishment doesn't have any explanation for it, and honestly, because there is medicine so readily available to control symptoms, there will probably be very little research done to determine causes and how to fix the problem instead of just bandaid the symptoms.

Fast forward to now, all is well!  I take a pill every day, and my last checkup indicated that all seems to be fine.  Like I mentioned previously, I'm not sure I will know when my levels are going off track until it gets particularly bad.  But, then, I also know how quickly "things" can be gotten back under control with proper medication.  So, the Lord has blessed me with a medical issue that is so mild, so manageable, and so not a big deal!  I'm really, really grateful for that.  And that, my friends, is all there is to know about that Thyroid Thing!  :-)

Thoughts on prayer and faith

I read a devotional recently that touched me.  For those that don't have time to click on the link, the gist of it, for me anyway, was how important it is to turn to God in prayer, especially when you've messed up.  It referenced Jonah and how while he was in the hell of the great fish's belly, he didn't curse his situation.  Instead, he cried out in repentance to God.

It reminds me of my children.  They will do something wrong and will get into big-time trouble.  But, just as soon as they get over their initial punishment, they seek out the punishing parent for comfort and for forgiveness.  That is exactly what I am supposed to do with my Lord.  It was a good reminder of why and how we are to have the type of faith that a child has:  faith that trusts no matter what.  Here is an excerpt from this devotional:

When we find ourselves suffering for our own sins, we are sometimes tempted to avoid God. Out of a sense of guilt, or pride, or embarrassment we turn away from God rather than turning to him in prayer.

But, as Jonah observed, afflictions are sometimes sent to draw us to God, to deliver us from our sinful path: “I cried by reason of mine affliction unto the LORD.” The very affliction is what brought Jonah to cry out to God.

God has never yet turned away any sinner who prayed to him in repentance. Jonah found that, even as he suffered “in the belly of hell” he was able, through prayer, to come to God in his holy temple.

Being Thankful - Day Thirty

On this last day of the month of gratitude, I want to think about the very act of being grateful.

A couple of weeks ago, I was rocking the little squirt to sleep (ahhh, the benefits of being the "baby"), and I felt such gratitude for having this child, all my children, in my life.  I did nothing right so as to deserve them.  I am not the "world's best mom" by any means.  Yet, here I am with the blessing of three children.  And then, it occurred to me that the very act of being grateful for something like this points directly to a Creator.

If you're walking down the street, and you accidentally drop your keys out of your purse and a kind stranger picks them up and hands them back to you, it's normal to feel gratitude towards that particular person for doing a kind deed.

But, for the really huge things like family, children, etc, to whom does that gratitude go?  If you are holding a child or a grandchild and you feel so thankful to have them, why are you thankful?  Don't dismiss it as simple happiness.  You know it's more than that.  You can't simply be grateful to "the universe", because you are still implying that there is a life force bigger than you that had a part in this life you are holding.  As Psalm 19:1 expresses, the very heavens speak to a Creator.  The very earth and its inhabitants speak to a Creator.  The gratitude or thankfulness or the feeling of being overwhelmed with gifts speaks to a Creator.  Because if there wasn't a Creator to whom your gratitude was due, then you would simply care for your child as an animal cares for its child.  By instinct.  Without long-lasting emotion.  Dogs don't cry when they see their puppy.  They take it as a matter of fact, then go about licking the puppy clean.  But, we cry from the overwhelming emotion of holding this gift.  Why?  Because our very souls recognize our Creator, even if our minds refuse to acknowledge Him.

Sometimes, taking the first step of saying "yes, I acknowledge the absolute fact that there must be a Creator.  This world is here by Intelligent Design" is the hardest for some people.  But as my pastor always says, "it's amazing what unbelievers have to believe to be an unbeliever".  Getting yourself out of your own way and giving your gratitude to its proper Recipient creates a sense of peace in your heart, and it will allow you to feel the work that the Holy Spirit has already begun to do in you.

Gratitude itself is not just due to the Lord, but it is a gift from Him at the very same time.  ALL good things are of the Lord.  Praise isn't due to a person for being good; give thanks to God for the goodness He has put in that person.  And when you are sitting alone with your thoughts and feeling thankful for some good thing in your life, recognize the Creator in that.

Thank you, Father, for this past month of focusing on the gifts you've given to me and to my family.  Thank you for the good things that others have done for us and through us.  Today, Lord Jesus, I am thankful to You for all things!!!

Being Thankful - Day Twenty-Nine

Tonight, I'm grateful for this past month of focused gratitude.  Knowing each day that I needed to post something also made me realize that it was hard to pick just one thing.  It took a month, it seemed, to just get through the "big stuff".  Yeah, I broke down and expressed gratefulness for rotisserie chicken one day.  I did.  But, for the most past, I realized that the "big stuff" encompasses SO much of my life.  I have an abundance of gifts that, truly, a lot of us have.  But until you get to thinking about them, it's easy to forget how important, and how many, they all are.

Today has been one of those days where I've felt a lot of stress coming at me from a number of places, and I've felt a bit out of sorts.  I can't really explain it.  Maybe it's as simple as I need a quiet, peaceful day at home, and I don't see one of those on the horizon for awhile.  Maybe I'm feeling the typical stress of the "holiday season", where all the multitudes feel the pressure to put on an event to celebrate the Season, regardless of the fact that we all have SO many of these events to go to already.  Maybe I'm just cranky today.  WhatEVER the problem is, as I sit here and type, I realize that our gratitude is necessary when we're feeling good, when we're feeling cranky, when we're feeling downtrodden.  Even when we're feeling lost.  The hardest time to feel gratitude can be when the world gets all over and up in your business.  Yet, that's the time when we have to figure out how to let go of the stuff that is pestering our peace and focus on the Giver of the peace in the first place.  It's not easy, and the Lord never promised an easy path.  In fact, He pretty much assured us of difficulties.

Yet, we are to praise Him continually for He is good.  And we should be grateful for all the blessings we have at all times.  Good, the actual living entity that is the opposite of bad, is what God is.  If there is good in this world, then it is because God is there.  So, even on a weirdo day like I'm having today, I think of the good things, the blessings, in my life, and I thank Him.  I praise Him.  I remember that this life isn't about me in the first place.

And I will go to bed and shake this off (hopefully) and will rise to remember from Whom this past month's worth of blessings came.  Lord willing, this little pep talk to myself will do some good.  :-)

Being Thankful - Day Twenty-Eight

Today (yesterday), I'm so thankful for a van full of giggling 9 year old girls on their way to Nutcracker rehearsal, playing concentration and falling out in laughter when someone can't think of another food.  I'm so grateful for the sweet moms who have been faithful in the carpool so that we ALL don't have to make the trek across the Rez for every rehearsal.  And I'm grateful that the Lord has put all these lovely things in my path.

Just lovely and fun and sweet.  Thank you, Lord, for protecting these girls so that they still have so much of their naivete!

Being Thankful - Day Twenty-Seven

Tonight, I'm thankful for a family full of All-In!  It's a long story, so ask me about it sometime.  The short version is we all decided we were All-In after talking about Matthew 6:22-23 tonight.  Even widdle Lollypop said she was, although she really didn't know what she was saying.  But it was pretty cute nonetheless.

Thank you Lord for some precious family time and for reaching the hearts of our children in their youth.  That is a blessing for them, but it's also one for us.  And, You make them alive in You!

Being Thankful - Day Twenty-Six

Today, I'm very grateful for a good checkup with the thyroid doctor.  My levels all look good and he felt like the gland had possibly decreased in size a little bit.  Praise the Lord, it looks as though I'm responding to the drug therapy in a textbook fashion!

I'll go back in six months for a follow up ultrasound, and if, Lord willing, that looks good, then I'll hopefully only have to check in with him once a year!

I haven't talked about the whole "thyroid thing" as I call it, but I'll post an update on that soon.  It's no big secret; I just haven't gotten around to blogging about it.  The blessing of it all is that through the hand of God, a problem was caught before it caused any major problems!  Thank you, Lord Jesus, for sending healing through the expertise of the good doctors who treat me!  And thank you, Lord, for the good chiropractor who found this in the first place!

Being Thankful - Day Twenty-Five

Today, I'm thankful for all the experiences my parents provided for me as I was growing up that have allowed me to be able to do the things that I do today.  Ballet mom, soccer/baseball mom, homeschooling mom, photography mom, Mary Kay mom - all the odd variety of things that I do can be traced back to something that fed either my mind or my soul as I was growing up.  And, without my parents hard work to earn the money to pay for it and to physically get me to those activities, I'd not have those experiences to draw from.  (Mom, avert your eyes from the preposition that ends the sentence.  It sounds best like that).  ;-)

Thank you, Lord, for giving me parents that loved their kids and always did their best for us.  Please guide our actions with these three kids you've given us so that they will grow to honor you in all they do!

Being Thankful - Day Twenty-Four

Today (yesterday), I am thankful for a husband who understands me enough to know how much I love having the whole family help with decorating for Christmas, who also loves that himself, and who cares enough to cut short his day in the woods in order to help make that happen!

You're a good man, Jmk.  Thank you for making yesterday so fun and productive!!

Being Thankful - Day Twenty-Three

Tonight, I'm so thankful for Thanksgiving Part Two and for loving parents who are so gracious about not caring about which day they celebrate with family.  Thanksgiving on Friday?  Sure!  Why not?

It was a lovely day.  Poodle made the brownies and decorated the tables.  We collected leaves from Cascades and from the Trace and from our front yard to use on the tables.  I even wandered around the house and located our wedding china and crystal!  As a homeschooling family, we have had to give up things like china cabinets and buffets and... well, and the dining room!  ha!  We need the space for bookshelves and craft drawers and just plain move around space.  So, finding the "play-pretties" for holidays requires finding china stored under sinks in various bathrooms and finding serving pieces stored somewhere else and trying to remember where in the world that other bowl is now.  You can imagine, right?  It's like a treasure hunt, because I never can remember where it all is!  :-)

We had SO much food, because my mom did most of the heavy lifting with regard to the cooking.  (I had my list of food to prepare, but she only left me with the easy stuff!)  It was all soooo good, and we very happily ate way too stinkin' much.  :-)  Hands down, Mom makes the best pecan pie evah.  My local brother and his family was there (minus one sweetheart) and Jmk's dad.  And, we also had a lovely visit with my college roommate and her family as they were coming through the area on their way back home.  So, the kids had a BALL playing with everyone.  And it was a house full of people, and I loved it.  Loved it!  Holidays are getting a little easier as the kids get a little older.  (Even the Little Squirt wandered around with Uncle Ken yesterday.  Last year, she wouldn't wander two feet away from me).  And I used to almost steel myself for holidays, worrying about the kids' behavior and that kind of thing.  Now, I can see that I can look forward to being with family.  Sure, the kids' behavior still matters, but I'm not as worried about it.  Sure, they still need me, but not in the same "every needs" kind of way.  There is some sadness in that, but at the same time, I'm so thankful, so VERY thankful, that the Lord has allowed me to get to this point.  It's an undeserved blessing, and I'm so grateful.

Thank you, Lord, for the gift of family and for allowing me to be a part of one that loves me back!  It's no small thing to have a family that works to stay together.  And to have a DNA family AND a by-marriage family that make those efforts...  well, I have been given a lifelong gift!

Being Thankful - Day Twenty-Two

Today (yesterday), on a beautiful Thanksgiving Day, I am thankful for the efforts of a beautiful woman who loves the work that it takes to get her family together.  She plans and works and thinks and accommodates for weeks and weeks in order to be sure that her family stays close and we are able to connect with each other, face-to-face, on a regular basis.

We had a beautiful afternoon, eating lots of really good food, and we enjoyed being with family!  Aunt Jen, THANK YOU for the work that you put in.  And to the other sisters, thank you for all you did to help get the food there and out and for always being a part of the joy and laughter and LOVE that surrounds the family.  I sure lucked out to have married into such joy.

I give God the glory for the good days like yesterday!  Thank you, Father, for blessing us with a precious afternoon together.

Being Thankful - Day Twenty-One

Today (yesterday), I am so thankful for the giant sized blessing of the possibilities of "On Kackley Pond".  We don't know God's timing, but we are so, so grateful for the chance that we may be having new home adventures in the future.

Thank you Lord for guiding us through the process so far, and I pray that You will keep us in Your will as the process continues.  Please deliver us from bad decisions and things that will not be honoring to You.

Being Thankful - Day Twenty

Today, I am so, so grateful for the life of one little boy.  This little boy who has the world's best, biggest hugs.  Who has the sparkliest blue eyes.  Who tries so, SO hard at everything and has his mother's tendency (unfortunately) to get mad at himself when he can't do something just right.  Who loves his sisters and plays with them, but who is ALL boy, ALL the time, a fact which is becoming more apparent to me as time goes by.  Who is so smart, even if he can't always find all the words he needs to explain some of his thoughts to you.   Who struggles with eczema all over his sweet body.  Who has the challenge of a weaker immune system than his sisters, but who is a Tough Guy about everything.  Who loves so fiercely, and so loyally.  Who, after I had a particularly bad coughing spasm after swallowing some food the wrong way, asks me with very intense sincerity "Mommy, are you okay?  What can I do that is nice for you to make you feel better?"

I love him so much.  He is such a blessing to me and Jmk.  Of all the boys in the whole world, I would pick him every single day.  Thank you, Lord Jesus, for blessing us with him, our little Turkey Baby Tooter.

Happy Birthday little man!!  We wouldn't trade you for a gold monkey!

Being Thankful - Day Nineteen

Tonight, I'm so thankful that I have a sweet husband who makes it possible for me to go and pursue hobbies as often as I can.

I had the opportunity to take headshots of some fantastic Mary Kay directors and consultants this evening.  But, to do that, Jmk had to feed the kids supper, get 3 kids in the bath and ready for bed, and put them all to bed single handedly.  Of course, he's totally capable of that.  He always has been.  But, frankly, it's a big job and it's a lot to take on at the end of what was already a long day.  But he never ever complains and he always supports me when I step out of my comfort zone to do something that is really just for me.

Thank you, honey, for being such a great dad and such a great husband and an even better friend to me. I love you and I'm so grateful to God for putting us together!

Being Thankful - Day Eighteen

Today I am so grateful for the loving family that celebrated Tooter turning 7 with us.  They took their Sunday afternoon to be with us, even though it might not have been the most convenient thing for them.  And they played and braved the VERY bright setting sun at the park and laughed and gave the birthday boy copious hugs and smiles.

I'm so grateful to have these people around us.  I'm so thankful for the love they have for the kids and for the big, huge love that the kids have for them!

Thank you all for being there yesterday!  And, thank you, Father, for blessing me with family.

Being Thankful - Day Seventeen

Today, I'm thankful for that stranger in Hobby Lobby who complimented me on my mothering skills while I was in the "breaky breaky" section with a 3 year old and an almost 7 year old.

The aforementioned wee ones were being particularly wonderful at that moment in time, for which I have no one but God to praise.  But, I really appreciate that nice lady for saying those precious words "you're a good mom".  Those are words that can produce tears in almost any mother out there.

Hey, not for nothing, but MooMoo?  SueSue?  You're a good mom.  Truth.

Being Thankful - Day Sixteen

Today, I am thankful that someone is HOME.

After a raging MRSA infection, 1 in 5 chances of survival, 102 days in the hospital, and countless hours of PT and OT (that will be ongoing), my Uncle John walked into his own home today!  His left leg isn't yet what he wants it to be, and he still has a long way to go to get back to "fine", but he is home.  And my dear aunt who has been by his side this whole time gets to have her husband back home where he belongs.

We give God all the praise for this, because we know that His will intended for Uncle John to beat this infection, and He answered our prayers for John's survival in such a glorious way.

Uncle John, we love you!  Keep getting better each and every day and take time to look back to remember how far you've come already!

Being Thankful - Day Fourteen And Fifteen

Today, I'm thankful for two things:  my home state and the freedom it affords us with regard to homeschooling and homeschooling in general.  In the admittedly silly effort to maintain some anonymity (when am I going to give that up?), I won't list the state.  But, thankfully, there are enough responsible, freedom-loving people in our state government that feel strongly about homeschooling freedom.  We may not be Texas, but we are awfully close with regard to the openness of our homeschooling laws.  It's simple to express intent to do it.  There aren't cumbersome tests to take that prohibit parents from choosing the best curriculum for their kids.  There aren't pesky requirements about paperwork and the like, which means I don't have to spend precious time filling out forms or turning in information that no one is really going to look at anyway.  It frees me up to educate the way I need to without burdening me with rules that accomplish nothing.  We have a wonderful state!

And I'm grateful that we are on this homeschooling journey.  It's hard, it's confusing, it's overwhelming at times.  Many days I wonder if I'm doing the best I can for the kids.  Many days I look in the future years and Flat Out Panic.  But, I see the development in the kids that inspires me to keep going.  I know there is a connection between us that is just different.  I know that none of the kids are going to get labeled in order to explain their personality.  It's a blessing that we are able to do this thing for them.  It's not for every family.  Some days, I wish I could take a break from it so I could think a coherent thought.  But, when I have breakthrough moments with the kids, it lifts me up and reminds me that this is good for them.  Not perfect; it's good.  No school will be perfect.  No school has all the answers, including the one at our home.  But it's good, and any good in it is because the Lord has shown us mercy and given us grace.

Tonight, I'm thankful!

Being Thankful - Day Thirteen

Today, I am grateful for the $4 rotisserie chicken that you can walk into the grocery store and pick up at a moment's notice.

Oh, I know this is so not anywhere near the same "important things" list that I have been listing thus far.  But, tonight, it was this very thing that made our family life so easy.  And, truly, I'm thankful that I live in a place where I can walk into a small grocery store, go grab this really, really good chicken, feed everyone, and still have chicken left over for meals tomorrow.

We get home in shifts on Tuesday because of Poodle's ballet and a late co-op class for Tooter.  And, there was an additional hiccup in the schedule today which necessitated me making an extra trip to deliver a forgotten item that ultimately resulted in my getting home an hour later than expected.  I cut up a quick salad, made some pasta for the kids, heated up some hot dogs for the Boy who is still the world's pickiest eater Ev-AH and says he doesn't like chicken even though he likes the smell of it, make some garlic toast, and BAM.  Everyone has something to go with the chicken that they like, it's easy for me, and it's cheap.

I'm thankful to have it!

And, Mom, I saved the bones this time.  :-)  There will be homemade stock in the future, for sure.

Being Thankful - Day Twelve

Today I am so thankful for the times when the whole family is sitting at the table talking about things of God.  When Jmk reads from the Word and the children talk to him about it, I become so grateful that God allows us this time and that He blesses it.  We are nothing that He should give us anything, so when He blesses us for taking that time together, it's extraordinary.

No, we don't have family scripture study nearly as often as we should.  But, we are attempting to make this more of a habit and less of a novelty.  And nights like this evening remind me of the importance of that.  The fact is that there is a God who created the world.  The fact is that He communicated with His creation via what we call the Bible.  Having access to our Creator in this manner and through prayer is humbling.

Thank you, Lord, for being with our family!

Being Thankful - Day Eleven

Today (yesterday, actually), I am thankful for men and women who make a decision to do a big, huge thing.  Who make a decision to alter their thinking and change their bodies and leave their families and commit to something bigger than they are and risk everything they have.  Sometimes it is out of necessity.  Sometimes it is out of love for country.  But it always results in the same thing.  People who make sacrifices that result in our country being safer, our liberties being protected, and our sense of security given a foundation.

I am so grateful for our veterans, their families, our current members of our military, and their families for doing what they do.  For doing the hard stuff.  For doing something much harder than talking about freedom.  They defend it.  They do something oh-so-much harder than complaining about the other side of the political aisle.  They prevent others from coming here and taking away the freedom to complain.

And some give all, right down to their last breath on this earth, as they fulfill their commitment to their nation.  Their family lives with that heartbreaking honor.  For those men and women, simple gratitude is not enough.  It is our duty to continue to be a strong, hard-working people to honor those who defend with their lives our ability to work hard.  We are not "workers".  We are citizens.  This is our country, built on principles of honor and freedom and submission to our Creator.  And this nation was created because people gave their fortunes and their lives.  Live bravely and be strong and be humble to God for His blessings of this country of honor!

Being Thankful - Day Ten

Today, I am thankful for my friends.

They are everywhere!  From California to Florida.  From Connecticut to Texas.  England.  Africa.  Holland.  Germany.  The Lord has put so many people in my life that bless me in so many different ways.  I have friends who have known me for oh so long; they even knew me back when I was skinny!  (ha!)  And I have new friends who have only recently come into my life who have become practically family to me.

I've heard it say that friends are the family that you get to choose.  :-)  I'd start naming names, but you know I'd miss someone important.  I'm just so grateful for those relationships that nurture me, that teach me, that love me, and that encourage me.  Thank you, my friends, for loving me even when it's not easy to do so.  And thank you, Lord, for giving me the blessing of those friends.

Being Thankful - Day Nine

Today (okay, yesterday :-D), I am thankful for Kung Pao Friday!

Jmk and I don't do a lot of date nights.  We just don't.  There's babysitters (which means cleaning up the house and extra money) and scheduling and gotta get all spruced up after a long day and on and on and for a couple of homebodies like he and I are, all of that just sounds tiring.  We love being with each other, and we need that time together.  All couples need non-child time together.  I totally agree with that!

But why does that time hafta happen out of the house?

So, on Friday nights (or Saturday nights, or Monday nights, or whatever works into our schedule that week), the kids get a fun nacho night supper.  They get to pick whatever they want to eat AND they get to sit in the living room and watch a movie while they eat!  Major score!  Then, after everyone's gone to bed, my perfectly fabulous husband makes kung pao chicken while I go take a shower.  Then, we get to eat, together, on the couch, while we watch something on the DVR that only grownups should see.  And no one says "mommy" or "daddy" the whole time we're eating.  And it's really good, and no one complains about not liking it, and we watch NCIS or Last Man Standing or DIY network, and no one complains about wanting to watch My Little Ponies or Transformers.  And it's our chance to really exhale with each other.  ::exhaaaaaaale::

I'm so thankful that I married a man who likes to just hang out on the couch.  I'm so grateful that he likes to cook (and he's good at it) and that he likes to do wonderful, sweet things for me like have this wonderful supper made for us while I'm in the shower.  I'm so grateful that we have been blessed with the ability to talk with each other about anything and everything.  (Because that isn't easy for some people, and I am vividly aware of how precious of a blessing it is!)

Thank you, Lord, for the times that you give to me and Jmk to exhale and just be with each other!

Being Thankful - Day Eight

Today, I am grateful for the recent national election.

Hear me out.

I feel like there was a message sent to the nation; we've complained about this very thing for awhile.  But, I think, deep down, we didn't really believe it was true.  We're becoming a nation of poorly educated, uninformed people.  I do not mean that in 30 years, there will be a majority of the electorate that is poorly educated and uninformed and unable to envision a life where personal responsibility is paramount.  I mean that now, right now, there are more people who don't get it than there are people who do get it.  And, all signs point towards this trend only becoming more of a constant, rather than a fluke.

Here's what has been driven home to me in the past 48 hours.  I need to be sure our kids are getting an education that is rich in history, rich in economics, rich in Biblical knowledge, and rich in civics.  Jmk and I need to be sure that we are raising future leaders and future adults who insist on living a life of honor, with respect for elders and Biblical compassion for those in need.  We need to be sure that we are teaching them the importance of making their faith their own.  We need to make sure that this overwhelmingly burdensome societal need to avoid hurting hyper-delicate feelings does not cause them to make poor decisions or think irrationally.

Lest one think that I am referring to the national choices only, there were also some community choices that led me to have these same reactions.

But, I'm done with it.  It is astounding to me how ignorant so very many people are to simple, basic economic principles.  They truly do not understand them.  Our children are not going to follow down that pathway.  As I tell them all the time, "you may not like it, but you have to do it anyway".  There is a huge section of our country's population who need to hear that mantra a few times.  You may not like the fact that socialism doesn't work, has never worked, and will never work.  But you don't have to like it for it to be true.

I admit that this Being Thankful day is a therapy session for me.  In all honesty, I AM truly grateful to have been given this moment of clarity with regard to what the Lord expects of us as parents.  I'm not sure I would have gotten it so clearly if I hadn't seen the election numbers, both nationally and locally.  But I've got it now.  I don't expect my children to think just like me.  I expect them to be smarter, braver  and better Christians.  I pray for them to find spouses who are like-minded so that they may not be unequally yoked.  And I realize that no matter what Jmk and I do, they may make poor choices along their way.  But, it won't be for lack of effort on our parts.

Strength of character is waning in our nation.  But, God gives his children a spirit "of power, and of love, and of a sound mind".  I will cling to that as we look towards the future and work for the senatorial elections in 2 years.

Thank you, Father, for not giving up on me and continuing to teach me, even though I do not deserve one second of Your attention.  I am thankful.

Being Thankful - Day Seven

Today I am thankful for my church family.

Now, there are lots of different kinds of churches out there, and they all have their idiosyncrasies, of course, when it comes to their membership.  Our church is no different!  But, it is a precious body of people who have such a bond with each other.  Let's face it.  There aren't a whole lot of other Christians out there who believe exactly what we believe.  So, it's not like you can leave one Primitive Baptist church and find another one on the next corner.  I've been a part of other PB churches, but that was when I lived elsewhere!

There are people in my church who have known me since my age was still counted in weeks.  I watch a handsome 16 year old lead song service now who once was a little tow-headed sweet baby who stole everyone's heart. We've all been together for a long, long time.  And, even if you've only been a part of this church for mere months, once you decide to become a member, you may as well know that we consider you to have been here forever  as well.  We're family.

We don't have Sunday Schools or Small Groups.  We all worship together.  Every time.  Every body.  From the youngest (no nurseries either!) to the oldest, we're all together.  Young learns from old learns from young.  Sure, there are problems from time to time.  Once you get more than one human together, there will be problems at some point.  But unity is always our ultimate goal.  We are a body of sinners, and we know we are saved by the grace of our Lord.  We know we were chosen for that salvation through the mercy of our Lord.  We know that we believe these things because of that salvation.  We know that we are a part of a large body of sinners out of every nation, every tribe, and every tongue.  And we know that not a single one of those people who we will meet in Glory will be there because they believe on Jesus.  They believe on Jesus because they were chosen.  And that gives ALL the glory to the Lord, where it belongs.

Not very many in this world will profess this truth with their mouths.  So, our church family is precious to us because they do believe and profess these very things.  Thank you Father for the blessing of worshipping you, with like minded people, where the worship gives YOU all the glory!

Being Thankful - Day Six

I give thanks to God for the blessings of my in-love family.  Let's face it, when you get married, it's sort of hit and miss as to what kind of family you're going to get, right?  I lucked out.

I LIKE my husband's family.  I'd hang out with them even if I wasn't related by marriage.  Truly!  And they love me back and make me feel so welcome, so supported, and so loved.  I'm a blessed girl.

This past weekend, Jmk's family buried their matriarch, Jmk's grandmother.  Having everyone together, albeit for a difficult reason, was so nice.  I love them, and I like being with them.  My children love them and like being with them.  It is such a blessing to enjoy being with one's husband's family.

I love you wonderful in-loves!  Thank you, Father, for surrounding my life with family, both by blood and by marriage, who fill my heart with such joy.

Being Thankful - Day Five

Today, I thank my Lord for my parents and the family that they created for us.  I am blessed with two great brothers and one great sister.  I only live near one of them.  Yet all four of still hold a close bond with each other, even through the miles that separate us.  I suppose the fact that we have the blessing of instant communication has a lot to do with that.  But, the fact is that we want to keep the bonds of family strong, even though we are far apart, in different stages of life, or have different interests and ideas.  I love y'all, L, R, and D!

And I'm so thankful that I was blessed with two good, honest, hardworking parents.  Through easy times and hard times, I've always had them both actively a part of my life.  They were gifted with good health all of my growing up days.  And they parlayed that good health into devoting so much of themselves into their family.  My sweet father went through a most difficult heart surgery earlier this year and its accompanying difficult recuperation period, and he has approached even this incredible challenge with the same consistency, determination, and steadfast self discipline that he has used throughout his whole life.  A good sister at church, Charlotte, told us that heart surgery doesn't just happen to the patient.  The whole family goes through it.  That is very true for my mom.  Yet, she has figured out how to mentally organize the myriad of emotions that became her new constant companions.  Just as she organized four busy children's schedules, along with staying very much on top of their school work, and not missing a beat with her church responsibilities, she used those same skills to figure out this new world of worry and intense love that surrounds her and my dad.

I'm so grateful, so thankful, that they are both still with us.  And I'm so grateful for their strength and for the new chances to love them more and hopefully learn more from them.  I'm so thankful that they raised me in a home that recognized Jesus Christ as Lord.

I love you Mom and Dad!  And I'm so thankful that y'all are my parents.

Being Thankful - Day Three and Four

I had to miss yesterday so I'll do a combo post.  Today, I am thankful for my husband and my children.

There are so many cliches I could fall back on, and there is a reason for them.  They make an attempt to explain the blessing of the relationship of a good husband and the blessing of having children.  I'm not sure I can stay away from them entirely.

Jmk is the type of man that I would want my daughters to marry.  That's the most accurate description I can give of him.  He is loving.  Accepting.  Patient.  He forgives.  He trusts me, believes in me, leads me.  He provides for his family tirelessly both in a financial sense and in an emotional sense.  Sandwiches for supper because it's been an impossible day and I have absolutely nothing planned to cook?  He thinks it's great!  House is a disaster area, kids are all in their rooms being punished, and mama is considering running away to Tanzania come 5pm when he comes home?  Doesn't phase him, no matter how exhausting it is to walk into a war zone after having been at a stressful job all day.  He'll help with laundry, help get supper on the table.  He does the lion's share of grocery shopping so I don't have to schlep the kids out after a long day of school.  He doesn't look at the dust and gunk and grumble.  He tells me everything looks great.  He accepts the cluttered, oddly organized house because he embraces homeschooling.  He communicates with me, talks with me, about everything.

Being unconditionally loved by your husband, being able to wholeheartedly trust your husband, knowing that your husband has the family's best interests at heart is something for which I am humbled.  And Thankful.  Way down into the depths of my heart.  Because God put us together, and He made it happen in spite of all the dumb decisions I've made over my life.  I love you Jmk!!  (And he won't even get mad at me for posting all this even though he just hates this kind of thing!)

I'm also so very grateful for my children.  I'm so keenly aware of how much of a blessing it is to even have children.  So many of us take it for granted, I dare say.  And Jmk and I know how big of a blessing it is to get through a pregnancy.  But just to get pregnant is a miracle.  And for us to have been blessed with three children is such an enormous gift that we simply don't deserve.  But, I give all praise to the Lord for His mercy and His grace.  I don't do such a great job at mothering some days.  Let's be honest.  I get mad, lose my patience, drop the ball on SO many things.  But, yet, those precious children still love me, forgive me, come back to me every morning with hugs and and love and an honest desire to be with me.  What a blessing it is to be a parent!

Y'all, there are a lot of days that I don't feel up to the task of guiding a human being into adulthood.  Those are the times that I realize the the Spirit is handling things for me, because somehow these kids manage to learn something and manage to grow in their love for the Lord, even on the days that I'm about as personally effective as overcooked spaghetti.  For that, I am humbled.  Because let me assure you, I do not deserve that kind of grace.  But that's what grace is.  Getting something in spite of what we deserve.

As I've tried to type this out this morning, the littlest has already come up to me to read her something, and I've said "no".  But, as soon as I quit and go read to her, she'll be SO glad and happy and she'll think I'm just the best thing since they put the pocket in the pita.  Thank you Lord for the tender and loving hearts that you give to children!  And, thank you Father, for allowing me to be a parent.  My heart is heavy with gratitude and thankfulness for this family that you have given to me, in spite of me.

All praise and glory to God!

Being Thankful - Day Two

I'm going to need to change my planned post for today.  Instead, I'm going to be grateful for the life of a dear woman who had her homegoing today.  She raised 4 beautiful girls.  Had six beautiful grandkids.  Four beautiful great-grandkids.  She lived just over 91 years on this earth, and as I type this, she is seeing the face of her Lord.  She has finally seen her beloved husband who has been gone from her for so many years.

The past year of her life has been difficult; there is no doubt about that.  She has slowly declined every day over the past year.  It has been truly a labor of love for her daughters to not only spend so many nights away from their own homes, but also to watch the decline each day.  But they endured.  And tonight, Jmk's mom, along with her best friend in the whole world, were by Grandmother's side as she slipped away from the body that she no longer needed.

I'm so grateful that we were there today to see her.  I'm grateful that we took photos of the kids in her backyard this morning.  I'm so grateful that I was able to love on her and tell her that she was loved, that she was precious.  I'm so grateful that Jmk was able to hug her and love on her before we left today, not knowing that it would be the last time.  I'm so grateful to have had the chance to know her.  I'm grateful that my children were able to know who Grandmother is.

Tonight, I'm thankful for her life.

Please pray for Jmk and his family as they mourn her loss.

Being Thankful - Day One

My my.  July was it?  I knew it had been awhile, but I didn't realize I'd been gone quite that long.

I've seen many bloggers do this in recent years, and it's such a good idea.  Spending the time between November 1 and Thanksgiving Day spelling out each day something for which they are truly grateful.  Yesterday, Toot asked me what my favorite holiday was.  I told him Thanksgiving, although I'm sure he wouldn't understand why.  (He didn't ask.  He just said, "oh!  Okay, well mine....")  But, for me, while Christmas is such fun, Easter is precious for what it represents, Independence Day urges me to remember the courage and fortitude from which we came, Thanksgiving Day gets in my heart.  It's about family.  And love.  And, being human, there's abundant food involved.  But we are asked to remember our blessings and express gratitude for those things with which we are blessed, in spite of what we deserve.  That's all this day is about.

And that is precious, important, fun, wonderful and absolutely coram Deo.  Coram Deo - something Jmk and I hope to live out more consistently as the days and years go by.

So, with that in mind, today's entry as well as Thanksgiving Day's entry will be the same.  I am so grateful for the promise of life, given to the children of the Lord, even though we don't deserve it.  I'm so grateful to have been raised in a church that gives all the glory to God for that salvation.  I'm so grateful to know that my hope of salvation is not real because I believe on Jesus Christ.  Rather, my belief is simply evidence that my salvation was already purchased.  Praise GOD, I can't even take credit for my belief.  But what I do with what is in my heart IS up to me.  I can't ignore it; I can't say it doesn't exist because it's not convenient for me.  And, as I attempt to teach my children about this world that was created by God, I am being blessed with more understanding - a tiny bit more each day, even.  What a precious, valuable thing that is.  To be loved by the Creator of the Universe and to be allowed to learn a bit more about Him every day is something for which I am so very thankful.

Because of Singing School...

...and Sisters Patti and Hannah, this little two-almost-three year old can sing the books of the New Testament!  At the moment, the Corinthians are being called the Phillipians.  So, they're gonna just have to deal with that identity crisis until she figures it out.  And, she speed-sings the last half of the books.  'Cause that's how she rolls.  So listen close guys and gals.  :-D  But what I love so much (and it's hard to hear, because we were in a restaurant) is that before she starts, she goes "mmmmm".  Just like sweet Hannah did, in order to set the pitch, before she started singing to the little kids.  Melts my heart.  When she finishes figuring out the Old Testament, I'll post that too.  Enjoy!!! 

(Full disclosure - I finally learned all the books of the Bible in order this summer too.  Yay for Sister Patti and the Littles' Class!)

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Big Cut - Watch for Contact!

Big Man is playing baseball for the first time.  (yay!)  He's playing with the Y league, and it's a little 8 week season where they fit in about 10 games.  We're not even having practices any more; we're just having games.  And it's so cute - the kids stay at the plate until they actually make contact with the ball.  Even though it's coach-pitch, if they can't make contact, then someone will set up a T-stand so that the player can actually hit the ball.  Then they run to base.  There are no strikes or outs, etc.  Basically, it's a no rules beginning to baseball to get them used to the idea of the game.

It's a fun, gentle way to see if they enjoy the sport.

Tooter has really been enjoying it so far.  (yay again!)  I've mostly had my camera with me, but last night I  decided to take some videos.  He got to bat three times, and they are all sort of in a montage together.  Now, I didn't get the record button going fast enough, and he made contact on the first pitch, so the video starts literally AS he's hitting the ball.  (my bad)  Then, you'll see his second and third attempts at the plate!  Not the greatest video ever in the whole world.  I think the website I use to video-share sort of "cuts the quality" of the video to make it smaller.  (Which I can't complain about, especially since it's a free service!)  But for those folks who think he's cute, I figure they won't mind.  ::grin::  I can email the real videos to whomever might like to see them.

He's our big slugger.  ;-)

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C25K Week5 Day3! DONE!!!

Can I get a wahoooo??!!??


C25K is the nickname for the Couch to 5K program.  It's a nine week program that is designed to take a non-runner from no running at all to being able to run a 5K from start to finish.  (That's about 3.1 miles).  There are 3 runs each week, and each one is a combo of runs and walks with a warm-up and cool-down walk of 5 minutes each as book ends.  UNTIL the 3rd day of the 5th week.  This is the day where you have a 20 minute run, with zero recovery walks, in between the warm-up and cool-down.  And I did it!!!  Towanda!!  (Fried Green Tomatoes reference, y'all).  


Now, you know me.  I just gotta qualify everything.  So, let me qualify the above celebration by saying that 14 of these 15 runs so far have been on the treadmill in the garage.  (Yay, SueSue, for the treadmill!)  And they haven't been so much "runs" as they have been jogs.  And, if I'm being REALLY honest, some of those jogs have looked an awful lot like bouncy walks.  And, as I can attest from doing one of my runs "in the real world", treadmill running is way easier than real world running.  Mentally, it's harder, 'cause it's tee-totally boring.  But, physically, it's easier.  So, if I were to go outside this minute and try to run for 20 straight minutes, I'd likely not be able to finish it.  Why, then, am I doing all this on the treadmill?  Well, I have little kids.  One who still naps.  And I homeschool.  And my sweet husband leaves before the crack of dawn (literally) in the morning so that he can be home as close to 5 as possible, but still get in the 10-12 hours a day that his job entails.  So, I can't just up and take off around the neighborhood and leave the kiddos unattended.  Thus, the treadmill in the garage has been great!  And I'm blessed to be able to do that much, because I remember a time where finding 30 minutes to myself was absolutely not an option.


But, see, that's not The Point.  The Point is this is the first time in my whole life that I've ever run for 20 minutes straight in any form whatsoever!  Even my totally fit dancing/cheerleading days from high school, I couldn't run 20 minutes straight anywhere.  I have been dreading this day of the program since I started, and to finish it is heartening and exciting and motivating like you wouldn't believe!  So stinkin' excited.  I started singing "Eye of the Tiger" to Jmk when I came in from the garage.  Heehee!  (Rocky reference, y'all).


Now, I'll be honest.  I'm 4 lbs heavier than I was when I started all this.  My tummy isn't any smaller.  (I look 4 months pregnant without Spanx and 2 months preggo with it!)  So, I have GOT to actually do some diet modification and some extra exercising during the days I'm not running.  But, by george, I know for a fact now that my stamina is increasing.  And the muscle strength in my legs is increasing.  And getting to this point is just exhilarating for me!


I know there are an awful lot of exclamation points in this post, so I do beg your forgiveness.  :-)  I've got another 4 weeks to, which will eventually culminate in my running 30 straight minutes.  And, at that point, I'm supposed to sign up to actually run a 5K.  While I completely understand what I'm supposed to do, I think I'll wait until I can prove to myself on my neighborhood sidewalks that I actually CAN run 30 straight minutes in the real world.


But, after that, I'm gonna really do it!  The person who said she'd never run unless she was being chased by someone is going to run a 5K!  I have to do it before next January, you know.  ;-)


Want to give it a try yourself?  Here's a link to the explanation of the program.  And, this is the app that I bought for my iPhone that has been worth every penny.  (And I hate paying for apps). 


Praise God for a wonderful day at home (plans changed so that I didn't have to go anywhere!) today, lots of chores getting done, a last minute decision to exercise, and a date night on the couch tonight.  :-D  Today has been a rainy, nasty, perfectly fantastic day!

For Renae and Patty

All the things that I said I was going to do in that post from way back in January were truly sincere intentions at that time.  They were more than resolutions.  I did intend to post more often and exercise more and lose weight and be in a healthier place come January of 2013!  I had a plan, and I was excited.

What, then, derailed me so quickly?  Life.  Always life.  :-)  My dear father went through a heart attack, open heart surgery (triple bypass), extra return to the hospital, and then an ICD placement.  Most of that happened in January.  And while one would think that that very thing would be fodder for lots and lots of cathartic blogging, I just couldn't.  I can't really explain why, but I just couldn't put out there all the things that my mind was working on and all the places to where my emotional state was traveling.  There were highs and lows of all sorts.  And there was so much I wanted to learn:  about the heart and its function and treatments and surgeries and medicines and psychological issues and physical issues.  The little bit of computer time that I had during the day was spent on those things and not sharing via this venue.

Oh, make no mistake, I was venting and talking and sharing and "dealing" every single day.  My God-sent husband was my source of comfort, rationality, advice, and encouragement.  He took off So Much Time from work, staying home with the kids, so that I could be at the hospital with Dad.  (I should clarify.  He didn't take off that time.  He simply worked until late in the night from home to keep all his balls in the air).  I don't even know how hard that was for him.  I have no idea how busy his office was during that time.  He said that they "weren't all that busy", but he would have said that had they been completely slammed.  He did what he did because he puts family first.  And, I can not tell you how grateful I am for that!

So, I was getting all the "stuff" out of me and I didn't need to come here to do any of that.  But life kept happening, nonetheless.  I ran the first day of the Couch to 5K program early in January, and then I didn't come back to it until March.  MARCH.  But, I came back to it!  I've had some hiccups, but I've made it to the 4th week of this 9 week program.  To be in full disclosure, I started week 4 last week, and had to stop.  So, I'll begin anew this week!

The kids got an extra January break from school, and, yes, we're a bit "behind".  The thing is, with homeschooling, there really isn't a true "behind".  The schooling happens at any time.  I think most any parent knows what I mean.  Their kids come home from school, and then begins homework.  All parents homeschool to varying degrees.

I haven't lost any weight, because I haven't really been adjusting what I've been eating.  I did lose a little bit of weight during the hospital days, but I've since gained those pounds back.  However, I feel so much better just because I've been moving!  The splits are getting there, and my arabesque has gotten a little higher!

There has been progress.  :-)

I've actually been asked in the past few weeks, by two sweet friends, about the blog.  So, Renae and Patty, this post is for you!  Thank you for still checking in.  We all depend so much on the miniaturized Facebook snapshots of everyone's lives, that I practically don't even know how to blog any more!  The exercise of just spitting out this little bit of stuff has already reminded me how much my brain needs this exercise.

By the way, I've started a blog for my photography pursuits.  While it seems as though I'm attempting to start a business, I haven't really.  It's truly a simple pursuit.  It's a creative, yet technical, activity that feeds some hungry parts of me.  While I am absolutely open to holding appointments, at the same time I'm well aware of my limitations.  But even a blind squirrel finds an acorn every now and then.  :-)  Since I'm still trying to maintain some anonymity on this blog (laughable endeavor, though it is), I won't list the address.  But, it's my first and last name then the word photography.blogspot.com.

If you're my FB friend, I'll eventually have the courage to put that address on there too.

I will not lie - the world rocked on its axis earlier this year.  But, the introspection that it caused has been valuable.  The deepening relationships that I've experienced have been nourishing to my heart and have taught me some necessary lessons about friendships.  There has been clarity, and there has been confusion, sometimes all at the same time.  But the Lord put the right people in my path to encourage and surround my entire family in prayer.

Daddy is improving a little bit every day.  If you were one of those prayer warriors, my heartfelt gratitude goes out to you.  And when you prayed for me?  You helped to carry me over the scary parts. I am uplifted by knowing the good that God does in those He chooses to use.  My desire for God and for Heaven has been strengthened during these past 4 months.  Praise Him that this world isn't all there is.

I love this.

Happy New Year!

Happy New Resolutions!

I recently saw a joke about how New Year's Resolutions are merely a to-do list for the first week of January.  ;-)

And, honestly, that has typically been what I've experienced with resolutions.  I'm so bad with them.  My intent is good, my spirit is willing...  then, I get half way through January, the shine and shimmer of the New Year has already begun to dull, and I'm back to my same old ways.  And my "resolutions" become just one more thing I didn't get to.  And, of course, THEN I feel guilty and unproductive for the rest of the year.  Stop The Insanity!!

SO!
I'm going to put it On The Line.  I'm putting it out there for all to see.  I'm going to put my goals, or resolutions if you will, on the blog.  Now, I will some accountability.  Hopefully, I haven't added undue pressure on myself.  We'll have to see how that pans out.  :-)  And, I'm going to blog more often, so that we can all keep up!

Whoops.  I guess the blogging more thing counts as a resolution, huh?  Hmmm.  Didn't think that one all the way through.  Well, this might mean blogs without pictures, because that tends to be what hangs me up.  I feel like every post should have some pictures to keep things interesting.  But I can't always get around to getting interesting pictures on there.  So I don't blog.  Turrible cycle, that.  Of course, blogging more than I did LAST year won't be hard.  I wasn't around much, eh?

So, my primary personal goal for 2012 pretty much revolves around improved health.  Here goes:
1)  Lose weight.

I know!!!  Stop yawning.  We ALL say it.  Every flippin' year, we say it.  And we really do mean it.  There are plenty of people who might recommend that I set a specific goal of X number of pounds.  Ehhh.  Maybe.  But I'm concerned that if I do that, I will get hung up on a number and won't focus on size.  Or, I will stop when I reach a certain number instead of continuing on.  OR, I will get disheartened because I slip up or plateau.  So, this time, next year, I will weigh less than I do now, which will be better for my joints and my spine and my overall energy level.  How much less isn't the issue.  I'm not going to have some enormous transformation by June or anything like that.  I'm just going to weigh less.

Y'all, I weigh more now than I ever have in my LIFE, except for when I was pregnant.  And, a great portion of that comes from a lack of the type of exercise that works for me.  Sooo.....

2)  Exercise more.

Yeah, you're yawning again.  That's okay.  This resolution glides very nicely right into the next one:

3)  Be able to do side splits and have at least a 90 degree arabesque again.

Ah HA!!  Now we're talking!  Now I'm getting specific.  It may take me a whole year, but I will get at least that much flexibility and strength back.  I will do different things to get to this point.  Stretching, exercise tapes, just doing barre exercises as I'm cooking tacos.  WhatEVer I can fit in around my particular schedule and needs.  I will do the best I can!

4)  Finally finish the Couch to 5K program.  I have started that program either 2 or 3 times, and I have stopped somewhere around week 4 almost every stinkin' time.  Why?  Am I scared of week 5?  Well..., yes.  Yes, I am.  But that's not why I stopped.  I let life get in the way every time.  Now, I will admit that it might take me all year to finish this 9 week program.  And that's okay.  I intend to have finished the program by this time next year.  That's all.

5)  Feel like I could dance with my brother at his wedding again.

No, no, my brother is very happily married and fully intends on staying that way.  But, if it WERE 2010, and he WAS getting married, I want to feel like I could manage to get through a swing with him without feeling like I needed to pass out just to feel better.  The C25K will help, but so will just dancing more.  I'm not entirely sure how I'm going to do that, but again, I'm going to work the details out as I go through the year.

One of the things that stops me in this typical January List Making is that I try to accommodate all the possible scenarios regarding planning exercise time around family, school, activities, etc.  It is impossible, my friends!  Not that I haven't tried to overplan in the past.  I have.  It's what I do.  So, I don't know how or when some of my exercising will happen, but I will figure something out.  No stress, no guilt, no beating myself up.  (That would be a great change for me right there!)

As much as I'd like to join the Y (and Jmk would be all behind it if I said we needed to), I really am unsure of the child care situation.  I'm not going to lie.  I'm worried about germs.  I'm not a germaphobe, really.  But, y'all, those places are breeding grounds for every single virus that is going around.  And when a kid gets sick around here, lots more than my "free time" gets put on hold.  Schooling tends to get put on hold.  And that throws all kinds of things off.  Bleh.  As flexible as homeschooling is, it also requires that I make decisions that support the home education lifestyle.  Right now, sick little kids would disrupt things in a significant way.  Sick older kids - not as much of a disruption.  But my babies are still little.  :-)  ::hug them!!::

So, ANYway, I really don't have concrete plans for dance related exercise right at this minute.  If I had access to a Mary Poppins, I'd go take (or maybe even start!) some adult ballet classes.  But I don't, so I won't.  However, now is not forever, and I don't know what kind of fun things the next year will hold!  As far as a diet plan goes, Jmk and I have decided to go with the well proven ELF diet.  Eat Less Food.  It works every time.  And, y'all, when you see me at a holiday function or one of my kids' birthdays and I'm having cake AND ice cream, remember that I said LESS food.  Not NO food.  ::grin::  Important, crucial difference.

Are there other resolutions that one would expect to be on a well rounded list?  Like, more time spent in God's Word, or building a photography portfolio, or learning a new language, or cleaning out clutter from the house, etc?  Well, of course, all those things (except the language thing - I'm so ambivalent about that for some reason.  Charlotte Mason would NOT be impressed with me) are certainly things that I strive to improve upon.  But, I've reached a point in my life where I feel like my health is important.  For me, yes.  But also for my husband.  For my children.  And it will be easier now to improve my eating habits, exercise habits, and strengthening habits than it will be even 5 years from now.  Thus, I'm going to focus on personal health for the next year.

As we travel through 2012, I hope to be more loving, more open, and more like the kid I used to be.  And, hopefully, there will be less of me in the process.

Oh, and apparently I'm going to be blogging more.  Fingers crossed on that one!