Easter morning pics

We took a few to share!  My favorite is this one of Jmk and the kids.  :-)

All three kids.  :-)  Mommy *had* to be in the pic for this one.

And a progress tummy shot.  20 weeks and 5'ish days.  We are over half way there!  She seems to be strongly growing which is encouraging.  I go back on Wednesday for another sonogram to check on the hematoma.  We're praying for it to be smaller.  The good news is that there has been no further bleeding.

Actually, she has gotten big enough that Jmk can press on my tummy and feel her kick, if she's riled up enough.  I don't remember his being able to do that this early with the other kids.  Of course, I can barely remember last week, so it's certainly possible that he could have.

Anyway, we are all "trapped" in the master bedroom today while the floor guys are here working.  We are SO excited to have finally made it to this week to get our new floors.  Jmk has done SO much work (all on his own, since I could do nothing at all to help) in demolition work to get ready for their arrival today.  And we're all sleeping on mattresses on the concrete floor right now.  But, by the end of this week, we'll have nice new floors and we are so grateful to be able to do this.  And I am so grateful for a husband who put in so much back-breaking work by himself to get us to this point.  (And to Tim who let us use one of the dumpsters at one of his job sites.  He saved us a ton of money in dump fees!)  And I won't brag too much more about how wonderful Jmk is, but he has never one time complained about all the work and never once said or did anything that made me feel bad (or, at least, any worse than I already did) about not being able to help him.  I love you honey!!!

Here are some demo pictures just for fun:

Up comes the kitchen flooring.  He rented a floor scraper for this job, and thank goodness for that!  It's not that this floor was of poor quality...  it really was a great floor.  But, it was green.  You know?  When we bought the house almost 5 years ago, it was one of the things that we said "we'll save up and replace these when we can".  They weren't awful green.  They were a pretty deep green.  I just didn't dig them.  Oh, and the red walls are going.  It was an experiment, and we liked them for awhile.  But red walls are tough to live with in a room that we spend SO much time in.  At least for us.  They're just so strong.

Tooter using the scraper to get up the mastic that was under the old wood flooring.  Before you go call DHS on us, this machine didn't move without being pushed, and that isn't a blade on the end.  It's like a shovel sort of thing that vibrates to help peel up well-stuck linoleum tiles.  The kids thought they were IT  getting to push the big floor machine thing.

There's nothing like high-powered big boy tools to make a girl feel like She-Ra.  Y'all remember She-Ra?  He-Man's sister or wife or girlfriend or something or other.  It was the 80's.  Cartoons.  You had to be there.  Obviously, I didn't pay extremely close attention.

From an email from SueSue

Our old history ends with the cross; our new history begins with the resurrection.

Easter Preview

To try to avoid stressing everyone out on Easter morning, I got the kids into their Easter duds yesterday and took them to the front of our neighborhood to take pictures.  Unfortunately, I couldn't really maneuver myself the way I needed to OR move them around like I wanted to.  But I got a few keepers here and there.  I don't think I got a true money shot of them together, but again, we had some limitations.  And I think I overdid things anyway.  No bleeding!!!  But, I just overdid it.  I know....  I know....  it was dumb.  I thought I was being so very careful.  I'm pretty much taking today completely off and will be resting on the couch.  Sparkie is still active and we used our home doppler thingy to check her heartbeat last night and everything seems to be fine.

Anyway, here are a few preview shots for Easter!

I'll get all the shots up on a site somewhere so the wonderful grandparents can see all of them.  :-)

Another FIRST!

It's hard to believe that she's old enough.  It's hard to believe that 5 1/2 years has passed since she was born.  It's hard to believe that she's about to have anything at ALL with the label of "adult" attached to it.

But all those things are true!  Poodle lost her first tooth today.  Barely an hour ago.  :-)

Just about 3 days ago, we were at the dentist for a checkup for her, and the doc said to not pull it quite yet, but that it was super close to coming out.  And, tonite - the Tooth Fairy Cometh!

Poodle, this past Friday, waiting for her dentist appointment to start.

Conversations with Poodle

Me:  Poodle, it's April Fool's Day.
Poodle:  Oooh!  So today is the day we get to play tricks on people?
Me:  Yep.
Poodle:  Play a trick on me now Mommy!
Me:  I will, but I can't until I know you're not expecting it.
Poodle:  Hmm.  Okay, I'll come back in a few minutes and tell you when I'm not expecting it.

Today's Update

Alrighty.  Overall, it's positive news, so yay!

I had my sonogram and the bleed measured 2.8cm.  I got some explanations as to the varying measurements, and it was accounted to different people doing the measuring, different machines, different positions of both me and the sonogram wand thingie.  Etc, and etc.  The 1.3 measurement, I think, was just an anomaly.  The problem comes with the fact that a 3D "thing" is being measured with a 2D measuring device.  It doesn't take much of a different angle to *really* change the measurement.  So, it's not that the bleed reduced a large amount and then got bigger.  (That would be bad).  The bleed simply hasn't changed much in size at all.  (That isn't nearly as bad as the other situation).  It appears that maybe the bleed (or hematoma or hemorrhage - all these terms are used interchangably) may be getting skinnier, even if it isn't getting any shorter.  And if that is true, then that does mean that it is resolving itself to some degree.  Which is a good thing!

If it isn't getting any smaller in any direction, then it's important to remember that it isn't getting bigger and Sparkie is growing appropriately.  So things are positive and I feel more positive.

Now.  I was mistaken about one thing.  I was under the impression that the hematoma was just in the uterus "somewhere".  That is incorrect.  It is actually between the placenta and the uterine wall and that is the primary reason that the OB is watching the area so closely.  Technically, it could cause a separation of the placenta, which would obviously be a bad thing.  But, then she went on to tell me that she has had a patient who went all the way to term with an 8cm hematoma and didn't have any problems.  So, having one doesn't have to mean bad things.

Because I'm not actually bleeding right now, the OB gave me a pass for 2 weeks this time.  (yay!)  I am still on limited activity, but it still isn't full bed rest - so that's good!  My sonographer, today, was more of a girly-girl with the sonogram, and she let me watch Sparkie have the hiccups and we looked at her widdle toes and saw her move her arms about.....  and it just felt more like these things used to feel.  You know what I mean?  Like back when Jmk and I would go in for those long awaited sonograms during our textbook pregnancies.  It was nice today.

So I feel better, much better actually.  Sweet Poodle asked me when I got home when I was going to be "normal" again (i.e. when I would be able to get up and just do whatever whenever) and I had to be honest and tell her that I didn't know.  That it may not be until after the baby gets here.  But, as usual, kids are resilient.  They will accept things as normal as long as Mom and Dad don't make them freak out about the abnormality of a situation.  So, I'm very glad to be feeling better about everything right now, because it will make it easier to be nonchalant for the kids.  And, because I'm beginning to feel more and more movement from Sparkie, that helps with the positive attitude.  It may be a looooong and limited summer, but then again, maybe it won't.  Doesn't matter.  Lord willing, at the end of summer, we will bring this sweet girl home and we can all get back to the "normal" that is The Zoo.

THANK YOU for every single prayer you have offered on our behalf.  God is answering them abundantly.  I still want to pray for the bleed to resolve itself, and if that isn't in God's plan, then for it to continue to be a non-issue with the health of the child.  Praise God for His mercy towards us!!!

God's answer to prayer

I have been praying for God to help me with my sense of peace and my ability to deal with our gestation situation appropriately.  I think there have been a LOT of prayers of that nature that have been said on our behalf.

Yesterday, Jmk's sweet Aunt Jennifer sent us an email and here was a portion of it:

But I know that fear is not "of God"...that fear is Satan's way of inching into our happy times, invading the holiness of our home and heart...and that is not a place you or Sparkey need to be now...

So, at the risk of sounding over-simplistic, tell Satan to "bug off" and quit robbing you of your joy.  I know you want the time to pass quickly to August, but these treasured days of carrying your little one are so necessary, for her to bond, for you to grow in love for her (as if what you already feel isn't enough!), and for your family to get ready for another member....

Relax and feel the loving arms of our Lord surround you, let His peace fill your heart and head, and know that you and Jason are riding the tidal wave of God, and all He asks is that you trust HIM and hang on.

 Then, I get to church this morning, and a sweet sister, Linda, used almost those EXACT SAME words when she talked to me.  She said that we can't let Satan rob us of our joy.  That fear isn't from God.

I can not tell you how precious it feels to have prayers answered like this.  For whatever reason, the "phraseology" that Jennifer used really spoke to my head and heart and has calmed me down to a great degree.  I have been repeating "fear is not of God" quite often since yesterday afternoon.  To be reminded that we NEED this time for bonding and growth of love was an important and timely reminder.

Thank you all so much for loving us.  For praying for us.  For being patient with me as I travel this rollercoaster and for praying for Jmk as he deals with me along with doing so much extra work for the family right now.  We love you all so much.

Oh, and I go back on Tuesday for another sonogram to check the hematoma area.  My specific prayer request is that the hematoma area measures smaller than last week.  Doesn't have to be gone.  Just smaller.  Thank you!!!

Another PG update. Hmm.

This morning, I had my "targeted ultrasound" (I think it may have some other fancy name like Level 2 or something along those lines, but I'm not sure), which was scheduled a month ago.  This ultrasound is recommended for women who qualify in the exclusive AMA program.  For those unfortunate pregnant women who don't qualify, there is still hope.  Just get pregnant after you are 35, and you too can be told you are of an Advanced Maternal Age, and you too can go through your pregnancy with the "you're old and your ovaries are pruning" cloud hanging over your head too!  Skipeedeedoo!!!

Sorry.  Got to brush the chip off my shoulder....  hold on.....

There.  Okay.  So, I was a good patient and went for this expensive targeted ultrasound as requested by my OB.  The purpose of this procedure is to give an actual M.D. the chance to take a close look at different things of the developing baby to see if there is a possibility of a variety of chromosomal issues and/or birth defects.  They check for markers for things like Down's Syndrome, Trisomy-18 (13? 21?), cleft palettes, spinal defects, hydrocephalus, other brain "issues", and some other things that I can't remember right now.

So, the wonderful news is that, according to appearances, Sparkie seems to be very healthy and doesn't have any markers for any future problems.  Of course, this doesn't mean there won't be problems, but medicine isn't an exact science no matter what they do.  Point is, so far so good.

The news that has me on edge is that when they measured the hematoma area, it measured larger than it ever did at the OB's office.  ::drumming my fingers on the keyboard as I try to figure out what to say::

Okay, here's the thing.  The likelihood that this measurement is more correct than the other measurements, I think, is pretty high.  This guy gets paid to see the two holes in the developing baby's heart (that are supposed to be there at this stage of the game) when the heart is the size of a pencil eraser. He likely measured the hematoma correctly.  Which means that the OB office's measurements are not 100% accurate.  BUT, we have to consider the fact that different people were doing the measuring, different machines were used, a different amount of time was spent on the ultrasound in general....  there are plenty of reasons for the discrepancies.  Plus, add to that, that no matter what the actual measurements are, the hematoma IS shrinking according to the sonograms from the OB.  At least, it did from Tuesday last week to this past Tuesday.

So, somewhere in my head, I understand that I don't need to get hung up on the actual measurements.  I need to focus on the overall picture.  My problem is that until I can get the OB's office to verify measurements, shrinkage, etc, I'm on edge.  I can't help it.  I'm nervous about whether or not the forward progression that we've made has actually reversed.

But, see, Sparkie's actual growth is right on target.  Her measurements are right on target.  She's apparently more limber than a Cirque du Soleil cast member.  (Not really a big deal for babies in utero, but it's still funny to look at).  Her heart is strong (praise God!) and whatever is going on with the hematoma isn't affecting her growth at all.  I don't have a good reason to be feeling nervous again.

Don't you wish you could still bend like this???  We called her our little baby taco.  Or baby fajita.  Mostly, I think we made the medical staff a little nervous about our overall state of mind.  Or maybe they just didn't appreciate our advanced sense of humor.  Ah-hem.

But I can't help it.  I just want to get this baby here and it seems like such a very, very long time between now and August.  And I know that God is in this - that if He wants this baby born, then she WILL be born no matter how many sub-chorionic hematoma/hemorrhages I develop.  But the lacking-in-faith, man-not-God-centered part of me that keeps making noise in my mind has me thinking about all the things that could go wrong.  It's not right - crazy in fact - and my head KNOWS it.  But I can't shake the worry from my heart.

I'll be more serious about my directives to take it easy until next Tuesday.  I enjoyed a wonderful sermon last night, but I will forgo the rest of the special meeting until Sunday morning.  And I will try my hardest to cooperate with Jmk when he tells me "stop - I've got this".  I'm close to feeling a little scared again, and I shouldn't.  I know I shouldn't.  UGH!!!

Speaking of Jmk, he was able to be there this morning.  My mom and dad took Tooter to Dad's office so that Poodle could come with us.  Jmk has had to miss all the many other sonograms that I have had during this pg, so it was SO nice for him to be able to see this one.  And, it was a good long one, so this was definitely the one to see!  And Poodle enjoyed it too, although I'll admit that she did get a little bored towards the end when it seemed like they kept doing the same thing over and over.  They weren't, of course, but it certainly seemed like that to a five year old.

Anyhoo, there's the latest.  We are as much in need of prayers as ever.  Maybe more for my peace of mind than the actual physical part of all of it.  I don't even know any more.  I just keep thinking about the first time that I'll get to hold this little girl, and I want so much to make it to that time.  We have no guarantee - but I can guarantee this.  Jmk and I will never, ever take for granted the miracle and blessing of a baby that is born alive and healthy.

Pray for us.  We need that more than you can imagine!

For the Grandparents (and Uncle David. And other loving relatives!)

Everyone else, I beg your forgiveness for the blatant bragging.  You really don't have to continue reading.  This is one of those times that I debated posting, but I knew I'd never remember to show this to all those people who would actually be interested, so this was the easiest way for me.

Poodle made a 100 on her math test today!!!  She hasn't made a 100 in a couple of months, so I was really excited for and with her.  I figure the grandparents and aunts and uncles (especially Uncle David and Aunt Leslie) would want to see what she's doing now, so I took a picture of her test.  The dumb machine that is supposed to scan won't do it for some reason, but hopefully this will sort of work.  (Click on the picture for an easier to read size).

Proud of you Poodle!!!

Gratuitous pictures of the monkeys

Because I haven't in a while.  :-)

Poodle was having her picture taken for the yearbook for our homeschool group after church.  So, I snapped a couple of the kids before we left.  

I'm pretty sure he was being a superhero of some sort for this picture.

Kindergarten Girl.  Hard to believe she's this grown up already.

OB Update

Woohoo!!!

Things are looking good!  Last week at this time, the "bad" area was 3.9 cm.  It is now 1.2 cm!  So, that is very good news.  And, because it has stopped bleeding, the doctor says that the overall prognosis is quite good.

I will have to go back in a week for another sonogram to (hopefully) verify that the area has healed up completely.  Which means another week of the same take-it-easy routine.  No strenuous activity, don't spend too much time on my feet, blah blah blah.  I will certainly do it because I would love to be able to report next week that the entire hemorrhaged area has healed up completely.  Now, this is going to put a kink in my plans for the weekend which were supposed to include an annual meeting at church.  But, I should be able to attend some of it as long as I'm not unreasonable about what I can and can't do.  Mostly, I have got to be sensible.  I have got to be sensible.  I have got to be sensible.  Gotta get it thru my thick skull.  Got to be sensible.  If I am a good girl and behave myself, then this time next week I'll be able to report a clear sonogram.

So - praise God for His blessings!!!  The area is healing, the bleeding has stopped.  The baby is growing and is very active.  I do know that this isn't a promise of zero future problems, but right now, things are looking fantastic!  THANK YOU so much for your prayers.  There were a lot of bended knees on our behalf, and my heart is so full of gratitude just thinking about it.

And, here's a picture from last week's sonogram.  (Sparkie was too busy this week to sit still long enough for a good picture).  Thank you all again!!!

Wherein lies the Hope

These are tough times for so many - retirement accounts and kids' college accounts have lost half their value.  There is a general instability in the employment market and in new business starts.  Housing markets are not great in most places and economies all around the world are depressed at best.  We are much slower to spend (actually, not such a bad thing, but when America quits spending, the entire world slows down) and some of us are completely changing our budgets to accommodate difficult circumstances.

Where is our Hope?

As the preacher said this morning (and it gave me both comfort and a better perspective, so I thought I'd pass it along, in case it can do the same for you), always remember wherein lies your Hope.  There has never been hope in Washington, but there's Hope for Washington.  There has never been hope in the United Nations, but there is Hope for the United Nations.  There has never been hope in Wall Street, but there is Hope for Wall Street.  .....
You get the point.

Let us all get stirred up and find our direction, our comfort, our guidance, and our perspective in what is real.  What matters.  What is right.  Open our Bibles.  Experience the gift of the Word.
Jesus knows His own and will never fail them.  Our treasure can disappear here, but never in Heaven.

Maybe the next time the mail person delivers a financial statement, I won't let it get me in such a cloudy state of mind.  The sun (SON) always shines.

Baby Names - the birth of Sparkie

Ever since little Poodle figured out that she was going to be a big sister again, we have been asking her what names she likes for the little one.  All along, without wavering, she would say Tim for a boy.  I remember the first time she said that, Jmk and I looked at each other with a "huh.  That's actually not bad".  And, because I was so sure that the baby was a boy, I actually had Tim near the top of the mental list.

However, the girls' names weren't nearly so sure in her mind.  The first name she came up with was Willa. The next name was Sparkles.  Yes.  You read right.  The next name was Isabella. (That one actually went on the real list.)  And, the name which is currently her fave is Lily.

Now, you have to admit that Sparkles is pretty rockin'.  Kat reminded me about Tina Sparkles from the movie Strictly Ballroom....  heh - you gotta love the name Sparkles.  Sparkles has already degenerated into Sparkie around the Zoo.  I suspect this nickname is likely to stick.  At any rate, as Poodle continues to add to the Nom de Poodle collection, we'll keep you posted.  Somewhere in there just may be Sparkie's real name!

3-31-09 update of names to add to Poodle's list:
Melody
Flower
Twinkle

OB Update

I went in this am for a follow-up ultrasound with the OB's office.  Turns out that I have a subchorionic hemorrhage, which is the cause for the bleeding.  It sounds quite yucky, but it actually isn't uncommon.  Mine isn't a terribly large one, which is good.  There is some concern because of the fact that it's still there in the early 2nd trimester and because of my age ::rolling my eyes here::.  But, I was only told to take it easy for the next week (modified bed rest) and I will go back to the OB in a week for another follow-up with probably another ultrasound to see if the area is "fixing" itself.  (Which is what these things do in good situations).  By good luck, we had already planned on having Spring Break from school this week, so this simply will be a laid back week.

Thus, the news is good in that there is a definable problem.  And a reasonable solution.  There is the underlying concern that an SCH can cause serious problems....  and I recognize that I really do need to treat the whole situation with good sense and care.  Miscarriage is a direct result of an SCH that gets out of hand.  However, again, I'm so grateful that God made the problem recognizable so that we would know how to handle it.  And, this could be so much worse.  So while it is serious, I am not scared.  Besides, it give me a real excuse to have a messy house.  :-)  To everyone who has prayed - THANK YOU.  I sincerely believe that we have been calm because of those prayers, and I believe that we were given a definable problem because of those prayers.

The other nice thing about today was getting to see the baby move and scoot around the ultrasound screen.  Jmk stayed at home with the other kids so he didn't get to see all that, unfortunately.  BUT, we were far enough along for the tech to be able to tell us the sex.  I didn't want to find out before Jmk, so I had her write it on a piece of paper and seal it up so we could open it at the same time when I got home.  All this time, I have been having boy feelings, although I didn't completely trust them because of all the apprehension that clouds so much of this experience.  Regardless, I was fairly sure about the boy thing.  I only felt once, during Granny's funeral weekend, that it was a girl.  Jmk, on the other hand, has been thinking girl for most of this time.

******************************
Can YOU guess what we found out???  :-D
******************************

Pregnancy Update and Prayer Request

We just returned from the ER because of some bleeding that I discovered upon going to the bathroom during church this morning.

Praise God, the ultrasound showed a normal fetal heartbeat and movement.  The amniotic fluid level was good.  Placenta was in a good place.  And the cervix was closed.  So, the ultrasound was blessedly unremarkable.  It was a very long ER visit to determine these things, but because we are less than 20 weeks in gestation, we had to do everything thru the ER.

As the doctor told us, when there is unexplained bleeding during a pregnancy, there is no way to know whether or not the body is trying to miscarry.  So, while we are very happy to report that the baby is still with us, we don't expect to be able to rid ourselves of the apprehension that has come with our happiness over our blessing.  Maybe the Lord is giving us a reminder that He is in control and that must have faith in Him.  That we must release our will and try harder to embrace His.  We have no way of knowing what the next 5 months will bring.  We have no way of knowing what the next 5 minutes will bring.  We will just take things one day at a time.  I humbly ask for your prayers when you think of us.  We need prayers for the baby's health, for us to desire God's will more than our own, and for a peace of mind that will only come from God, at this point.

We are relieved and we are reminded of the miracle of any baby that leaves a hospital.  And we are also weary because of the tumultuous emotions of the day and of what lies ahead.  God knows what is in store, and I pray that we can learn to trust in His plan, no matter the outcome.

Culinary Education

So, today for lunch, I asked Poodle if she wanted tuna.  (Didn't bother with Tooter.  Mr. Picky got his plain pasta as requested).  Anyway, she then proceeded to tell me just how to fix the tuna.  Expecting her to repeat to me our usual way of fixing tuna salad, I was surprised when she explained to me the following "recipe":
toast two pieces of bread
chop onions and celery
add mayo
add tuna
using a spatula, spread a healthy amount of the tuna salad on one slice of bread
place a piece of lettuce on top
add the other piece of toasted bread

Okay.  So, I figured she saw someone on the "cooking channel" (a.k.a. Food Network) make a tuna fish sandwich.  And, considering the simple southern'ness of it, I assumed it was Paula Dean.

I figured wrong.

It was Zefronk.

Ahhhh.  Who is Zefronk, you wonder?  Zefronk is a cartoon dog on the Disney channel who cooks snacks and easy meals and speaks in a bad french accent.  He doesn't have a show - he is merely a filler character.  Has a little 2 minute segment in between the real shows every now and then.  Poodle thinks Zefronk is IT on a stick.
And, apparently, thinks he makes a mean tuna salad sandwich.

And just in case I ever had any grandiose ideas about being able to stay on top of what information was getting into her head, this little episode today took care of that.  Culinary skills by Zefronk.  And that's how we roll at the Zoo.

King James Version

Amazing Grace!  It sounds so sweet, and it saved a loser like me.  I used to be lost, but I was found, I was blind, but I can see now.

Grace is what taught my heart to fear God, and it also made my fears feel better.  That grace seemed so precious, the moment I first started believing.

*******

Those are the first two lines of Amazing Grace, "updated" to current language.  Doesn't sound so great any more.  We were singing Amazing Grace in church yesterday and it hit me how beautiful the language was in the song.  And how unlike our regular speech the language was.  Which made me think about the King James version of the Bible.

So many of us now use "updated" versions of the Bible, where the language used has been simplified from the older English to read and be more modern.  I do not intend for this post to be a treatise on why we should all be using the KJV Bible.  But, if you don't read this version with your children or even to yourself from time to time, you're missing some beautiful language and phrasing.  You're missing some unique vocabulary words as well as a pseudo history of the English language as you go to look up what some words used to mean.

It's just a thought.  We all have a KJV somewhere in our bookshelves.  Go wipe the dust off and read some beautiful language today.

The past couple of months update

Because of a lovely post at The Beehive, I have been thinking that I really need to get back in to the swing of the blogging thing.

I need to dust off the parts of my brain where I store my limited vocabulary, start paying attention to blog-worthy happenings and comments, and just do it.  As I stare at a pile of bills that need to be paid, laundry that needs to be folded, and children that are working on school work at the kitchen table (well, one of them is doing schoolwork and the other is mostly just trying my patience today), I have to wonder why it's necessary to blog again.  But, there are so many wonderful people, especially grandparents, who have given me encouragement, cheered on the kids, and prayed for us because of this bloggy thing.  So, I'll get back to it.  Or, at least I will give it more of an effort than I have been the past coupla months.

So, what has the Zoo been up to lately?  Well, we made it through the craziness of the holiday season.  We've begun potty training in earnest with Tooter.  Going so-so...  he's a bit lazy about it all, to be honest.  Poodle has really found her groove with school stuff and I am discovering odd things like she can do the +9's with barely a thought, but the +2's trip her up in math.  We survived another season of Junior Miss, having a lovely representative picked for our local program from a group of equally lovely girls.  Jmk and I celebrated 7 years together, although we have put off actually going somewhere fun until after Junior Miss was over and we could enjoy a restaurant more fully.  Poodle has learned how to tie her shoes, and prefers to always have them in "double knots".  We buried a dear grandmother and have made a subsequent trip to her home to clear out some of the more sentimental "valuables" so they wouldn't be cleared out by someone who didn't belong there.  We have been gestating for about 14 weeks.  And we have been dealing with the stir crazy that comes with super cold weather.

Yeah...  that was my not-all-that-clever way of letting you know that Tooter has begun potty training.  Oh, and that we're expecting.  :-)
I realize that I'm not exactly shouting from the rooftops with glee and joy, and I hope that it doesn't come off as being ungrateful or as our being unaware of our blessings.  It's just that after 2008, which will forever be the "year of the miscarriages", it has been hard to be more joyful than apprehensive.  This is the farthest we have gotten than at any of the other times last year.  And I have been much more sick and much more tired than during any other time last year.  All the signs point towards this remaining a "successful" pregnancy.  But, we are very much aware now of how much we do NOT know what God's will is for us.  And we know that whatever we think is quite irrelevant, because it is only God's plan and His will that matters.  So, while we may think that everything is going well for now, we can't know that we're meant to have this baby on earth until we are actually holding him or her in our arms.

I will say that being pregnant has been extremely difficult this time.  Not just the normal physical frustrations of being in early pregnancy.  But the emotional toll that it has taken.  It is difficult to wake up each day and wonder what that day will hold - life or death?  It sounds terribly morbid and just typing the words makes me see just how unfocused I have been on the blessings and mercy of God.  But for the life of me, I have no idea how to quench those feelings.

However, we have made it to 14 weeks.  And while we hadn't said anything to Poodle (we didn't want to inadvertently rekindle the memories of the first miscarriage last year that was so hard on her), she actually figured it out on Tuesday.  I'm quite obviously pregnant now, and she looked at my tummy and said "I think you have a baby in your tummy".  We teased her for awhile saying things like "you think so?"  and "Hmmmm....  I don't know!....."  But we finally let her know she was right.  She is thrilled and thinks that waiting until August is just the most frustrating thing that could ever have been put upon her little 5 year old sensibilities.

We are very grateful for every single prayer that has been said on our behalf over the past year and into this one.  And we'll remain grateful for every entreaty that is made on our behalf to the Father.

So, those are the biggest highlights of the past two'ish months.  At least, those are the biggest highlights that I can actually recall at the moment.  :-)  And fingers crossed that I will get those Zoo doors open a little wider from here on out.

Perspective

If you take 787 Billion dollars, put it into a savings account for one little year with a measly 2% interest rate compounded monthly, at the end of one year, you would have $802,885,087,921.34.

In one year, you would have almost 16 BILLION dollars more if you didn't spend the $787 billion.

Just thought that was interesting.

Box Tops 4 Education

Knock knock...  anyone home?  It's been a while since I've been here, and to be honest, I'm still a little ways from coming back.  BUT, Junior Miss is *almost* over...  this coming weekend is the show.  And all kinds of weight feels lifted after the show is over and our new representative is selected.

So, maybe after that is done, I'll feel a bit more chatty.  :-)

However, I was thinking this morning about collecting Box Tops.  Do you know what I'm talking about?  General Mills products of all sorts have a little label somewhere on the packaging that says "Box Tops 4 Education" and you see a little 10 cent value on there.  Have you ever thought to yourself, "man, I wish I had someone to give these to.  It seems a waste to just throw them out".

WELL - feel free to give them to me!!!  Our homeschool group does collect these and we do redeem them. Twice a year.  That money is so valuable to us to help the kids do some various activities that they may not normally get to do.  I'd give you some "for examples", but each section does different things with that money.  Rest assured though, it goes to very good use and it is very much appreciated.

Here's a link to show you all the different products that carry the Box Tops 4 Education labels. 

Any time you can save one or two or ten of them for us, you will be very much appreciated!!!